chasing comets across the sky
did you take the costume off did you remember to go to sleep did you wonder how this day began the way that every day does my body aches for it that rest that place where the dreams of the night arrive where they dance between my eyes as though chasing comets across the sky and im left with a faint impression that maybe they held some truth for me something i couldnt grasp here because im so distracted by what isnt the immaterial princess cave and the lost art of magic and the way your hands moved across my forehead tracing memories and i seemed to fall into the bedsheets folded into it like pastry and you put me in the oven and turned me and blew on me and i came out fresh and hot and we ate together longing for a summer breeze the one that makes you treasure the first rays of light the one that leave a tingling on your tongue like bees and wasps that fly around me in my garden and i felt that they would swallow me that my body would become bumps and i screamed and i ran and you thought i was overreacting that i was safe from a threat id never known the first of many the one i saw you flee from cause i looked up to you the way a younger brother looks up to his older brother and i followed you believing in you and then the veil dropped little by little or perhaps in one display and i was left driftless without a role model roles reversed and i had something to prove that i was not you that i was different that i fit in that i would escape the gaze of onlookers the way you were caught up in fishing nets and stocking and we walked together to school and i didnt want to be seen so i left and made my own way i wanted my own life aways from yours to be in my own sphere that rocked around like an uncertain billiard ball and yours drifted down into the hole and i never liked that game i was so self conscious i couldnt play it not the way that they could not the way i wanted to i was clumsy and I leant over the table as though it were a priest and i didn’t want to spill wine on him that was my saving grace that kept me away i was tidy and left unkempt by the times i lived in my room was messy but i didnt mind it had everything i needed ordered in its own chaos but with time i longed for my own space my own place to put things down that weren’t resting in the unknown